The unnamed student of Astronomy, Peter Shitforbrains of Witchita Kansas, was too frightened to admit his mistake and allowed the comet to be reported in local rag The Witchita Eagle.

Shitforbrains was unavailable for comment today but his close friend and mentor, Alexander Notsogreat, said Peter is under a lot of pressure at the moment and has gone to a country retreat to escape the media, at 5 Woodside Vale, Slumming Town, Witchita.