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Aliens captured by the Ruskies and held alive
since 1959 in a specially adapted gulag, are expiring at an alarming
rate. Professor Giorgy
Rasputin, of the state sponsored Alien Research Centre, said "we
kept them locked away all this time separated in different rooms,
with 6 inch thick concrete and lead-lined walls. They did not
want to communicate with us and were unable to communicate with each
other. Then one day, 'Poof' they all started to expire".
Dr, Deke Zitter of the Colorado State
University believes the beings are dying primarily because of the
alienation of the alien nation.
The Flash contacted the research centre at
Area 51, Roswell for comment. However, the usual denials were
delivered by a spotty-faced young Colonel, a charmless person with
no social graces. SHAG
magazine are reported to have paid $100,000 for an exclusive video
of the expiration of the last alien, the one the Ruskies call 'Bob'.
End.
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